Each parenting personality has an internal question that drives their choices and actions. Fireball parents ask, “What is going to be best for me and therefore my family in this situation? How can I set boundaries to make sure I’m not overworked, overwhelmed, or anxious?”
(Read to the end to find out what drives the other two parenting personalities—Crescent and Constellation.)
Of course, all parents prioritize their child’s needs, but where Fireballs shine is in understanding how important their own needs and happiness are to the family unit.
They shine bright like the sun and clearly see how their rays help their family thrive. They know their own light and energy are vital to energize those around them.
How does that translate into their life? They’re great at knowing their own strengths and limits, and they verbalize their needs because they know that if their light goes out, the rest of their family will wilt.
Fireballs challenge the stereotypical notion that parents need to be “everything” to their child. They feel comfortable stepping away and welcoming other adult mentors into their child’s life. They embrace the “It takes a village to raise a child” mentality.
When it comes to interacting with their child, they resist the urge to jump in and “fix” things for them, because they want to encourage independence and confidence. Fireballs highly value problem-solving and self-sufficiency in their children.
Fireballs understand the value of natural consequences and embrace having their child learn through them. If things don’t work out well, a Fireball parent will counsel and support their child, and help them create a plan for a better future outcome, without needing to “make things all better.” They also feel comfortable giving their child the freedom to choose their own clothes, hobbies, and interests, even if they’re unfamiliar or not what they might pick.
Fireballs know that worrying too much about what everyone else expects of them can be a recipe for disaster. Fireballs do what feels right for them. They've learned the fine art of saying no to commitments and expectations that just don't work for them. Fireballs prioritize what they value and find a way to get it all done, even if that means delegating things out—from hiring a housekeeper to taking advantage of after-school childcare.
One of the reasons they do this is because they feel strongly that parenthood is not a reason to stop pursuing their personal and professional dreams and goals. For that reason, Fireballs are often a breadwinner in their family. At home, Fireballs tend to be more experienced parents who’ve “been around the block a few times” and have realized that parenting is a marathon, not a sprint.
Fireballs value their autonomy outside of parenthood and make self-care a consistent priority. Even though they may feel guilty about leaving their child to go to work or out with friends, it doesn’t keep them from going. A Fireball's "mom (or dad) guilt" is managed and they feel it less than some of their friends.
What is going to be best for me and therefore my family in this situation? How can I set boundaries to make sure I’m not overworked, overwhelmed, or anxious?
Even though you may be a Fireball at heart, that doesn’t mean your parenting personality can’t shift. And actually, it’s really important to know when to change gears!
Where Fireballs ask, “What is going to be best for me and therefore my family in this situation? How can I set boundaries to make sure I’m not overworked, overwhelmed, or anxious?”
Crescents ask, “How are my children (or the children I’m with) feeling right now? What can I do to make them more comfortable in this situation?”
And Constellations ask, “What can my family and I do to better our community, whether that’s a team, school or workplace, extended family relationships, or neighborhood?”
Fireballs might sometimes need to lean more into their child’s wishes (like a Crescent) or the expectations of other people around them (like a Constellation). That might mean jumping out of your comfort zone to allow your child to lead the play, while you follow your child's lead. Or, maybe flaking on Girl Scout cookie sales but showing up for all the troop's activities isn't a solid plan, because your child's troop is relying on you as a team player.
The Solar System Parenting Framework offers opportunities to understand ourselves better, and learn and grow alongside our children. This work of personal growth can improve our relationships with our child, our partner, extended family, and friends.
Still need to take the quiz? 👇
Each parenting personality has an internal question that drives their choices and actions. Fireball parents ask, “What is going to be best for me and therefore my family in this situation? How can I set boundaries to make sure I’m not overworked, overwhelmed, or anxious?”
(Read to the end to find out what drives the other two parenting personalities—Crescent and Constellation.)
Of course, all parents prioritize their child’s needs, but where Fireballs shine is in understanding how important their own needs and happiness are to the family unit.
They shine bright like the sun and clearly see how their rays help their family thrive. They know their own light and energy are vital to energize those around them.
How does that translate into their life? They’re great at knowing their own strengths and limits, and they verbalize their needs because they know that if their light goes out, the rest of their family will wilt.
Fireballs challenge the stereotypical notion that parents need to be “everything” to their child. They feel comfortable stepping away and welcoming other adult mentors into their child’s life. They embrace the “It takes a village to raise a child” mentality.
When it comes to interacting with their child, they resist the urge to jump in and “fix” things for them, because they want to encourage independence and confidence. Fireballs highly value problem-solving and self-sufficiency in their children.
Fireballs understand the value of natural consequences and embrace having their child learn through them. If things don’t work out well, a Fireball parent will counsel and support their child, and help them create a plan for a better future outcome, without needing to “make things all better.” They also feel comfortable giving their child the freedom to choose their own clothes, hobbies, and interests, even if they’re unfamiliar or not what they might pick.
Fireballs know that worrying too much about what everyone else expects of them can be a recipe for disaster. Fireballs do what feels right for them. They've learned the fine art of saying no to commitments and expectations that just don't work for them. Fireballs prioritize what they value and find a way to get it all done, even if that means delegating things out—from hiring a housekeeper to taking advantage of after-school childcare.
One of the reasons they do this is because they feel strongly that parenthood is not a reason to stop pursuing their personal and professional dreams and goals. For that reason, Fireballs are often a breadwinner in their family. At home, Fireballs tend to be more experienced parents who’ve “been around the block a few times” and have realized that parenting is a marathon, not a sprint.
Fireballs value their autonomy outside of parenthood and make self-care a consistent priority. Even though they may feel guilty about leaving their child to go to work or out with friends, it doesn’t keep them from going. A Fireball's "mom (or dad) guilt" is managed and they feel it less than some of their friends.
What is going to be best for me and therefore my family in this situation? How can I set boundaries to make sure I’m not overworked, overwhelmed, or anxious?
Even though you may be a Fireball at heart, that doesn’t mean your parenting personality can’t shift. And actually, it’s really important to know when to change gears!
Where Fireballs ask, “What is going to be best for me and therefore my family in this situation? How can I set boundaries to make sure I’m not overworked, overwhelmed, or anxious?”
Crescents ask, “How are my children (or the children I’m with) feeling right now? What can I do to make them more comfortable in this situation?”
And Constellations ask, “What can my family and I do to better our community, whether that’s a team, school or workplace, extended family relationships, or neighborhood?”
Fireballs might sometimes need to lean more into their child’s wishes (like a Crescent) or the expectations of other people around them (like a Constellation). That might mean jumping out of your comfort zone to allow your child to lead the play, while you follow your child's lead. Or, maybe flaking on Girl Scout cookie sales but showing up for all the troop's activities isn't a solid plan, because your child's troop is relying on you as a team player.
The Solar System Parenting Framework offers opportunities to understand ourselves better, and learn and grow alongside our children. This work of personal growth can improve our relationships with our child, our partner, extended family, and friends.
Still need to take the quiz? 👇
The Parenting Perspectives Framework & Quiz were first introduced in our book, Modern Manners for Moms & Dads. An Amazon #1 New Release in two categories, the book offers real-world advice on how to handle the sticky social situations parents with young kids face every day.
But rather than offering a simple list of dos and don'ts, Modern Manners for Moms & Dads incorporates the parenting personalities and helps readers consider their gut reactions to find a course of action that balances their needs, their child's needs, and everyone else's expectations of them.
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